(Trunks gives up and lands, powering down) Jeez, I can't tell which is more shattered: your father's body or your spirit. Now, how about you come on down, stop using that useless form, and quit wasting everyone's time. He just isn't stupid enough to try! And as we've seen today. (.) For God's sake, I bet even your father could do it. did you make that last one up?Ĭell: And the worst part of it is: that form isn't even new! Watch: (Cell bulks up exactly like Trunks) Look at me! I'm Trunks! Please love me, Daaaaaad! (returns to normal) See? Anyone can do it. As in a novice! An amateur! You're surrounded by fighters who have seen more action in a week than you have in your entire life! Hell, at your age, Goku had defeated an entire army, several demons, and sent a rabbit to the Moon! (effortlessly evades Trunks' followup attacks)Ĭell: Because you're green! (.) No, not like me, you idiot. Trunks: Then what do you call the last five minutes?!Ĭell: Pity. I mean, we made a talking (bleep) raccoon into a household name, for God sakes! We don't need you! Meanwhile, all the MCU had was Marvel's leftovers, and we made them into gold shitting machines. And you wanna talk about household names? You guys had some of the most popular characters of all-time and you royally screwed the pooch with them. (Box office earnings from Endgame fall onto Dick)ĭick: Endgame alone has made half of your entire box office. The X-Men are a multi-billion dollar franchise.ĭick: The MCU churns out multi-billion dollar MOVIES! Endgame, alone has made a third of your entire box office.
That's a lower ratio than Scott's screen time in X-Men 3. Out of 12 films, you've only managed to create 3 and a half good ones. The last time you guys were relevant, MySpace was a thing.
MORT SAID A BURRITO WAS FIGHTING IT OUT IN HIS STOMACH MOVIE
The only reason you have a movie franchise in the first place was because of the good will created by the 90's cartoon show. In the face of the unstoppable juggernaut that is The MCU, you are nothing. You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.ĭick Richards: Alright, I was trying to do this the nice way, but, now I'll just spell it out for you dumb-dumbs. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor.
They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY. Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layers lengthwise. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. Let me explain:īurritos are eaten from one end to the other. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. In this, you and I agree and are friends. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. On Earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat.
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